I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
