I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
