okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I need to sanitize my soul.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
