And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize