I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
