i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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