**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
