I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
