i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
