we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
