the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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