do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
it was like eating out sand paper
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
