This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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