We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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