There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
