why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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