My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
