So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
