Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
