I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
