whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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