belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
