all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
