I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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