worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
