yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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