If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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