If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
