lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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