Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize