PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
