I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I have peed in a lot of sinks
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
