Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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