I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
