You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
