just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize