The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
