i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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