I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
