I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
