You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
