Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
