If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Randomize
