Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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