she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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