i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
