absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Randomize
