oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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