never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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