apparently the secret to your success is patron
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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