Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize