Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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