Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
